In the words of one of my commenters, I have become verbose of late. I invite you to take a look at the latest Friends of Batahola newsletter. Even though I am not recognized (not that that bothers me or anything...) I wrote the articles on page 2 and 3 (except the president's column.) If you are willing to get past the 80s green header, take a look! Here is the link http://www.friendsofbatahola.org/newsletter.htm, and it is the Spring 2008 issue. I wrote the majority of articles in the fall (beautiful purple colour) issue as well.

There are many ways, politically correct or otherwise, to say that someone is poor. In Nicaragua, the au courant term is "personas de escasos recursos económicos," or people with little economic resources. One English word that comes to my mind is underprivileged. I think that the people I work with are underprivileged and the kids would qualify as "at risk."

Since I, as a child, and in the present, had many advantages (my basic physical and emotional needs were met, which is a big advantage) does that make me the average Canadian I like to think I am? Or does it mean that I was privileged or over-privileged?

What does it mean to be over-privileged? It means I can plan for the future. It means that when I'm doing a craft activity I don't hog the materials because I've never used them before. It means that I have every reason to dream and believe that they will come true because along the way doors will probably open, not because I deserve it but because of who I am...It means that I eat as much fruit and vegetables as I want, and as much meat too. It means that if everyone lived like me we wouldn't have a world to live in.

Is this development's goal? to give everyone my standard of living? because that is probably impossible. Then to what end do rich countries offer aid? A market for their products? guilt alleviation? Wouldn't it be better for the world if we de-developed ourselves first? If we tried to de-privilege ourselves before trying to give our privileges to others? To think long and hard about the liberties we cherish and whether they actually mean anything to the people we impose them on?

Ah, questions. At least I have the space to reflect and ponder and doubt. At least my job doesn't expect big "developments." While MCC may sound as if its emphasis on relationships bars real (North American style) work, it is much better, on a world wide sclae, to have people transformed by their experience in another country, and who will likely live differently on their return home.

(FYI, I am not mindlessly swallowing MCC propaganda...I really think this emphasis makes MCC different from many, not all, groups, and I think this is a good thing.)

Poverty is something that I see every day and can't ignore.

Poverty not pretty, noble or easy. In the beatitudes, Jesus tells us "blessed are the poor in spirit." Not blessed are those with less economic resources. Not blessed are those who help themsleves. Not blessed are those mothers who break their backs working to feed their children. Not blessed are those who don't have access to education. I don't think God could possibly want people to struggle for their daily rice and beans, nor could god want people to have so much they don't even notice what they throw away.

Poverty is someone buying three eggs and 250 mL oil because they can't pay for the dozen or the whole bottle. Poverty is the majority of a country's population not formally employed which means that nothing is open outside of office hours and no one seems perturbed. Poverty means that people work through strikes because if they don't their family will starve. It means that people's needs are so great that often their dignity gets pushed to the side.

God can't want that. We are all created in God's image. That means that we all have dignity that shouldn't be crushed or stepped on.

But many people need "the poor." Some people need them so they can feel good about helping. Some people need them and the cheap labour they supply to buy and sell things cheaply. Some people need them to make themselves rich (or keep their countries that way?) Some people need to step on others to feel better about themselves. I can see myself in many of these portrayals, and that is why it gives me pause.

What hurts me most, however, is how poverty and reality are discussed in the church setting. Nicaraguan catholics and protestants alike talk a lot (or use the phrase anyway) about God's will (not as much as in Egypt fyi). When this messasge comes from the authorities people stay small, silent and afraid.

The "difficult situation" or crisis, otherwise known as reality is often an extreme sport. If your spiritual leader tells you to accept it, what are you supposed to do? How can you change things? You can't. Too many (powerful) people are out there counting on complacency.

Here are two kids who study dance and music at the Center.

Cute

Here are students in the basic literacy class. Once they have completed this level they can begin primary school (by studying at night at the Center.)

Literacy

In the Bible there is a phrase (I think) that talks about speaking the truth in love. I would err on the side of truth, Nicaraguans on the side of love. Sometimes here I find myself frustrated by questions that are ignored, comments unacknowledged and general communication problems, despite my purported language prowess. Still, a few days ago, Nicaraguan communication, for a fleeting, beautiful, moment, made complete sense to me. I began to understand that everything takes time. While Nicaragua is not rural Pakistan/Afghanistan, Three Cups of Tea is not a bad analogy for communication here. First, you need to chit-chat, getting to know the other person, and peripherally understanding the context of the problem. In future conversations, in circular, and then hopefully more direct ways, the issue at hand can be addressed. But it's all about timing. If it isn't the right moment, there hasn't been adequate preparation, ni quiera Dios. Don't even try. It's just a little dance, is all. Too bad Mennonite don't believe in teaching that...

While it is probably not the best idea to criticize one's host country, I will do that right now. Nicaragua has leadership problems. I think that some leaders are corrupt on purpose because they want money and power, but on a more day-to-day level, many leaders just don't live up to my expectations. I think because people have so little influence on their own lives, or believe that this is true, any little thing they have, they exploit. Cultural hierarchical beliefs also play into this, so it is most often men who use the power they obtian to maintain the status quo. If thye wan tto change things, they will stay in charge. Unfortunately, women who want social change maintain the hierarchy, only it is a women telling people what to do, without really letting the less powerful people in the situation have their say.

Another attitude I find destructive and instructive is similing through suffering. I know many people don't want to share the intimate details of their life with someone they barely know, but too often I find people asking me why I am sad. Really, I'm not. Maybe I'm tired and stressed. Surely you have experienced stress of tiredness, I think to myself. Why must you always smile? Why is the appearance of happiness so desireable? Why can't you acknowledge that you, or others are suffering? Or, have you gone on like this for so long that it's no use anymore?

This brings me to my next thoughts. MCC's HIV/AIDS programme is called generations at Risk. I think Nicaragua's generations are all at risk (not necessarily from aids). I think many people would benefit from a supportive group of friends and family, or having a person to turn to for advice.

Given society's structure, men can find this in political gatherings, but for women it is extremely difficult. They have so much work to do that I doubt many could make a big time commitment to a group. Sometimes their husbands or fathers don't like them going out. But I think this would be the best way to turn society around. Give every person access to a group to just hang out with. The Center I work at began with the founders just talking with groups of women and together deciding how to improve their community. Today, these women are strong women, role models and often in leadership psitions at the Center. Knowing they are bringing God's kingdom to earth, they are also happy from the inside, out.

I have started a new project. A few weeks ago I obtianed some games from a Nicaraguan popular education institution/NGO called CANTERA. One of them is about Law 287, the child and adolescent code. It is safe to say that all children experience a violation of their rights in Nicaragua and in other places. This question and answer dynamic board game helps kids learn about their rights. One day, I was supposed to lead a workshop, and only one kid showed up, so I invited some other kids to play.

One of the other kids, a 12 year old girl named Josseling became a bit obsessed with the game so I gently cajoled her into planning an afternoon of games for kids. She wants to give kids some time to just be kids. The first meeting was last Friday, and while I saw it as a disorganized and slightly crazy afternoon, she saw it as beautiful, precious and fun.

According to some theorists, playing games is an important tool for social and societal development. Apparently playing games uses creativity, something sorely lacking in Nicaraguan and other developing countries' educational systems.

Josseling and her friend Ana want this fun afternoon into a children's club. I hope that it can happen.

The Nicaraguan popular mass was written in the 70s or 80s as a way to bring revolutionary Catholicism to the people. It sings about familiar places and puts Jesus into everyday situations (lining up to pay, selling things, a carpenter, etc.) There is a song for each part of the normal mass (Gloria, Kyrie, etc.), just with different words.

The gloria, whose purpose, I imagine, is to glorify God, mentions many different Nicaraguan towns. It says
"Glory to God in Siuna, Jalapa y Cosigüina,
in Solentiname, Diriomo y Ticuantepe,
glory to God in Tisma, Guaslala and Yalagüina,
in Totogalpa, Moyogalpa and Santa Cruz."
Now if God were glorified in these places Nicaragua would probably not be worse off.

But what I really wanted to say was that on Wednesday, I went to one of these places! While I was somewhat trapped in a small town called El Viejo (because of a transit strike...still going on actually, more to come on that front), the friend I was staying with was going to Cosiguina, so invited me along. Cosiguina is in the campo, about 60 km away from El Viejo, or 1.5 hours, at a fast clip. Said friend and a group of young people, together with a nun, were going to do a series of activities with children from the community of Cosiguina.

I couldn't help noticing the parallels with "mission" or "service" trips. The youth naturally felt bad for the kids, whose life is much harder than theirs, and wanted to make them happy for a few hours. The two leaders, young women from the community, seemed shy and reluctant to participate in the games. So, the more outgoing, more city-like young people took the lead. (Granted, if I were them, and 3 young men and 2 young women, more educated than me, came from the city, or larger town, and told me what we were going to do, I too would find it hard to participate and lead activities.)

After the activity (an hour or so of games of low organization), drinking coke and eating tortillas, the youth talked about how violent the kids were with one another. It can only be a reflection of what they see an experience in the home. These kids need love, they need someone to show them how to live in a etter way. They need someone to work with them every single day. The community has a beautiful building, now it just needs motivation to use it and a vision for the future.

A few weeks ago I went to a birthday party of my friend Carla (right) and her daughter (little kid). The other girl is another friend, Siliva.

Here I am with Claudia and Carla.

Nicaragua, as any map will tell you, covers a not insignificant part of Central America and its territory spreads from Pacific to Atlantic. As was the case in Belize, Honduras and I believe Guatemala, in Nicaragua, the British managed to make some inroads on the Atlantic Coast. As a result of their more hands-off interests, and the slave trade, the Nicaraguan Atlantic Coast has a very different flavour than Managua. (I haven't been there, but that is a generally held belief.) Indigenous people live in ways much more like those of their ancestors, and preserve their own language. There is also a sizeable Afro-Nicaraguan communiy that maintains Creole English as its language. Since becoming part of the same country, the Pacific and Atlantic Coasts have, one could say, struggled to understand one another.

During the revolution of the 1980s, led by the Frente Sandinista de Liberacion Nacional (commonly known as the Frente or the Sandinistas), one of the Sandinistas' greatest downfalls was their dealings with the Atlantic Coast. Although they reportedly gave many concessions (ie houses, food) they never received widespread support. They granted the Coast autonomy and then left its inhabitants to "do their own thing" in poverty (much greater levels there than on the Pacific), little infrastructure and great richness in natural resources (mining, lumber, etc).

This past fall Hurricane Felix destroyed the Northern Atlantic Autonomous Region (RAAN) and placed people living very close to the edge in an even more difficult position. Aid money has poured in, and if it managed to "get to the ground," has most often reached people who live in more accessible locations. It has probably not yet reached the hardest-hit areas. As far as I can tell, the region's leadership lies in the person of Brooklin Rivera, head of the Yatama Party. Through a strange twist of history, the Moravian Church is the Coast's main religion. Although Mr Rivera was at odds with the Sandinistas in the 80s, they seem to have reached some kind of reconciliation in recent years. Brooklin, I believe, appeals to most voters (or perhaps, as is too often the case in democracies, the others simply don't have any appeal). Lately, however, mestizo people from the Pacific have been moving West, looking for farmland. These people are often Sandinista supporters. This leads to a bit of a precarious political situation. Also, indigenous groups are exercising their communal land rights (land that may have been granted to others, but should not have been granted...) and to use their own election processes, governing methods, etc.

Somehow, this region was supposed to have municipal elections in the fall (November), along with all other Nicaraguan municipalities. It appears that immediately following Hurricane Felix leaders asked for a postponement but now it seems that in the three largest towns in the RAAN, elections have been suspended indefinitely.

While I have my doubts that any of the desired effects of a democratic government have ever really materialized in the region, Nicaragua is a democracy, and elections should be respected. Most Nicaraguans, furthermore, understand that voting is their right. So, it would seem that most Nicaraguans would see that a right is being violated.

Recently I was at a presentation and the presenter said that that was not that bad, because for her it was more important that indigenous ways be respected. She didn't care if there were elections or not. Unfortunatley, in these towns, I don't think there is much of a traditional structure, so I am not sure that is why they were suspended, or a good reason to defend their suspension.

Perhaps, the government wants to take advantage of the crisis that followed the hurricane. They know that their relationship with Yatama could be compromised if too many mestizo people voted for the Frente. This would mean they would have to form a new kind of relationship with the Coast.

Since, in the unestablished interim period, someone is going to appoint leaders for the municipalities where elections have been suspended, it could be a way for the government in Managua, to beging building a new relationship. Unfortunately, it could also set a precedent.

This morning I went to Nicaraguan imitation Starbucks and I felt like I was going to have many thoughts, so I bought a notebook (I had thought about going to work, but then the bus to the coffee place came before the bus to work, so guess which one won out). so as to appear as though I update my blog regularly I will share one a day until they are finished, because, indeed, I did have many thoughts. (I would like to apologize in advance for the Spanish structure of my sentences: very long and long-winded).

I have been hearing about this topic for far too long without weighin in. I have no great economic or political knowledge, but yesterday in a CCBN (where I work)staff meeting, we read an article by Ignacio Ramonet (whoever that is) who outlined 4 reasons for the crisis. We were divided into four groups and drew the reason we were given.

My group's reason was that in emerging economies, like India, China and Brazil, people now eat more meat (especially chicken and pork). This means that more cereals are being eaten by animals, meaning less cereals for people. Apparently, if China ate as much meat as the US, 50 % of the world's cereal production would go to feeding the animals the Chinese people would eat.

The article also outlined other reasons: increased biofuel production, speculation, and rising oil prices. In Nicaragua, the staff's consensus was that rising fuel prices and speculations are the causes of rising prices here. I would say that if the reason my group had is true, it means that there are less cereals available on the world market, which probably also drives up the price, just in a more hidden way. Some staff members mentioned other factors: too much food is exported, and that the land is not being cultivated because campesinos go looking for jobs in factories. I think in this there is some truth. A fellow MCC worker reports that many campesinos sell their beans to El Salvadorian rather than Nicaraguan trucks because they receive a better price from El Salvador. As for the campesinos moving to the cities, I think this is an ongoing phenomenon of the last century or more. Life in the Nicaraguan campo, as far as I can tell, is very hard. I was in a rural community recently and there were no youth and very few men. The men and male youth go to El Salvador to find work (closer geographically than Costa Rica, which is where most Nicaraguans migrate.)There are no female youth because they all have children, and then, to my mind, they may be youth in age but not in responsibility. The land also looks hard to cultivate. Why wouldn't people want to work in a maquila instead?

Back to the silent tsunami (the food shortage according to the UN World Food Program): here in Managua people line up to buy subsidized staples form Sandinista "stores" in people's houses. I don't think these stores discrimate against people with other party affiliations, so I can't say that I have a big problem with them, but I do think that everyone old enough to remember the revolution remembers lining up for hours to get anything. Is Nicaragua going back to the drawbacks of a revolution and civil war without the hope that that time connoted?

Scary times indeed.