This is the best thing I cold think of to write about. It’s the excerpt from a book I am reading and speaks of the theme that I am wrestling with in my life.

"His words are the essence of truth. He is not offering an opinion; he never utters opinions. He never guessed; he knew and knows. He spoke out of the fullness of his God Head; his words are very Truth himself. For my yoke is easy, my burden is light. Here we have two things standing in contrast to each other, a burden and rest. The burden is not a local one, peculiar to those first hearers, but one which is borne to the whole human race. The rich feel it and the poor for it is something from which wealth and idleness can never deliver us.

Let us examine our burden. It is altogether an interior one. It attacks the heart and the mind and reaches the body only from within. First there is the burden of Pride. As long as you set your self up as a little god to whom you must be loyal there will be those who will delight to offer affront to your idol. How then can you hope to have inward peace? The hearts fierce effort to protect itself from every slight, to shield its touchy honor from the bad opinion of a friend and enemy, will never let the mind rest. Yet the sons of earth are carrying this burden continually, challenging every spoken word against them, cringing under the criticism, tossing sleepless if another person is preferred over them. You are hurt because the world is saying about you the very things you have been saying about yourself.

Such a burden is not necessary to bear. Jesus calls us to rest, and meekness is His method. The person knows well that the world will never see him as the way God see him and he has stopped caring. He knows he is weak and helpless as God has declared him to be, but paradoxically, he knows at he same time that he is in the sight if God of more importance than angels.

Another is pretense. By this I mean not hypocrisy, but the common human desire to put the best foot forward and hide from the world our real inward poverty. To all victims of this gnawing disease Jesus says, "Ye must become as little children". For little children do not compare; they receive direct enjoyment from what they have without relating it to something else or someone else.

The heart of the world is breaking under this load and pretense and artificiality is one curse that I will drop away the moment we kneel at Jesus feet and surrender ourselves to His meekness. All that matters is that I give myself to the one who gave all for eternity.

Hey guys, lots has happened since Sept 5, my last blog. Being in my new country, I have noticed many things that are different from my first country, the USA. So one day, one of these differences was pointed out to me in a very direct way.

I went over to one of the neighbors house with my host mom, cousin, aunt and sister just for a visit. It was my first time meeting this lady. So as usual, when I meet someone for the first time, my host family gives them the rundown of who I am, what Im doing here and what I'm like. During my chat with this new lady she asked me
"Cual es aturata" which is how tall are you in English. I coulndn't really describe it in English so, because my height was so important to her, she whipped out a measuring tape and told me to stand up so she could measure me. HAHAHA. Talk about having the awkward laugh. Thats all I could do was laugh. If I said no I would be considered rude for rejecting this older persons request.

My height is just on of the many things stands out to others here. But an event occurred that will forever stand out in my mind.

It was lunch time, about 12:00pm and Emma and I ( one of the other NorthAmerican volunteers) were at a local outdoor restaurant. The restaurant was located right next to the main street. So, whoever walked on the sidewalk, I was close enough to make eye contact. We were both finishing up our meal when this man whom I will never forget.

The man was older maybe in his 50s. He had on an orange shirt that was so dirty, it looked like it was changing color to a black color as you got to the bottom of his shirt. He had on pants that were filthy and no shoes. He approached our table and asked if he could have the scraps on my plate. H e had a small sandwhich bag and was putting my scraps in his bag. Emma had a lot of food left on her plate so she told him that she could have the rest. So the man picked up here plate, and motioned to me to put the food in his shirt tail. He made something like a cup from his shirt to catch the food. Emma told him to sit with us and it the food instead. He sat and ate the food. he was asking us different questions, but we couldnt understand him. We were trying not to stare at him eating, but it was hard not to. It seemed like the longest 3 mins of my life.

when he was finished he rushed off. Emma and I coundn;t beleive what just happend. Being in Philadelphia, i have seen homeless people, worked in a homeless shelter and spoke with the people. But this experience was different. His hunger was different, his pain was different, his struggle was different and i had the opportunity to dine with him. what an honor.

That moring before I left the house I remember praying for God to help me be his hands and his feet today. I truly believe that was my oppurtunity. I wish I got the gentlemans name. Its always important wo give those who may feel nameless to remember that they are important and thier name matters to others.

A large part of me being here is to learn the language so I can hear peoples stories and better connect with them. But I have my times where i m like, " I dont want to speak spanish, "I want a break and only think in english" But He always reminds me that I need his perserverance and his joy and his strength and love to make it everyday. Everyday.

Thanks a bunch for all you guys comments, prayers and support. They all mean alot.

Gracias A Dios

Its been about 3 weeks since I have been here and It seems like a month or more. I washed one weeks worth of clothes BY HAND haha! And it was a workout. It took me 2 1/2 hours to finish. As some of you may know, there was a Hurrican in the country, but thankfully I am a couple of hours away from the storm. In the city where I am, we only got a thunderstorm.
My day consist of 3 hours of language conversation with 2 different tutors and 1 hour of grammar with another tutor. They are all in their early twenties, and a lot of fun to be with for my tutoring sessions. I am learning slowly, but surely and at times more slowly than I would like. I go to Church here with the family. But I do not understand barley any words during the service. So at times it reminds me of the Charlie Brown cartoons where there in class and the teacher is saying " blah blah wa wamp wamp" for 3 hours. I have some good books and a journal with lots of blank pages to help me keep focused and stay connected to God.

Everyday I take the public bus to school for about 30 min each way. The things I see while riding the bus have been making me think, pray, write, become angry and hurt. There are kids that come on the bus, sing with a small instrument and when finish, will walk from the front of the bus to the back, collecting money. It is school hours when the children are doing this so I know that they don't attend school regularly if any at all. The are tons of people selling food, water, towels, anything that doesn't weight too much in your hands, and are on the side of the road, in the bus or in the middle of the street selling. I thought to myself, " everyone is working hard, yet no one is getting anywhere, their still poor" it makes me think that the saying "hard work can get you anywhere" doesn't apply for everyone. I have been reading a good book called "Banker to the Poor" that has been opening my eyes to the financial institutions that work against the poor.

I have been pondering the statement that says to "take up my cross" and wondering what that looks like in my life now. The answers come as often as the questions. But one thing that I have learned is that giving up all things in surrender, and seeking after one thing, the one thing that makes the all the difference, Is the easiest and hardiest thing to do. Painful, but liberating.

"The just walk by faith and not by sight."

Paz ( Peace in Spanish)

hi guys, I made it here safe through many flight delays and a bomb threat in Miami airport. but GRACIAS A DIOS, thanks be to God nonetheless. the sun has not stopped shining or burning since we got here. its winter time even though its in the 90s. ( its considered winter because it rains about everyday for short periods.)the language learing can be very tiring at times, or funny as i get my words mixed up and make myself look stupid ( fun times!) the Lord has consistently reminded me about him being my shepard, which is one of the things he does best. my family, my MCC staff and host family are gifts from God. their excellent.the food is good, especially the natural fruit juices.

i have to adjust to some things, like the overcrowed, buses, loud street vendors and vans with loud rooftop speakers screaming propaganda in the early mornings.

but im learning to count it all joy and learn obeidence through suffering.

at orientation, which help send me off on a excellent note. i meet some friends i wont ever forget. but during oreintation,we had a cross cultural exercise in the form of a card game. i didnt understand the directions and a rule of the game was that we could not talk at all at any point during or before the game. by the end of the game i was frustrated and a bit bitter. i was actually suprised how much emotion came from a 20 min game. i concluded that i dont like not being in control of my environment if i can have a hand in changing it. i like it when i
m adequate and confident in new situations, but in this game i was not, therefore, i couldnt find my footing and felt helpless.

its now friday about a week away from oreintaiton and im playing a card game i dont know with my host sister and one of the other SALTers( north american) named Emma. i instantly get the flashback of the card game, but i came from it feeling alot different.

eventhough i didnt understand the rules right a way, i played nontheless. eventhough i made the same mistakes over and over again, i eventually learned. i concluded that it wasnt about getting the game right, but its was about enjoying the people i was playing with and if i didnt always understand or get it right, it was more than ok.

i would love! to hear from u guys. mimijamaica@aol.com